Chapter 1: Morning

Morning (before The Event)

5.44am – Lim Wyn
Lim crouches in darkness. Waiting.


5.55am – Bob Castellano
It was a full 10 seconds before Bob realised it was his alarm. The new “Early Riser” sound on the iPhone starts soft and slowly builds to coax you out of bed, making sure that you wake slowly and naturally and never, ever, ever hit…

*SNOOZE*


6.17am – Dave Godders
Dave awoke to the sound of his daughter crying, as he did every day. He thought to himself:

"When did my inner monologue start narrating my entire life? And why is it in the third person?

He didn't know. Maybe it started the day little Frankie came along - the inane outward baby babble had to be replaced with something coherent internally. Got to keep the mind sharp and focused and all that. Keep my head in the game.

"I've got this sweetie. You get some rest. I love you so much."

Dave kissed Paris gently on the forehead, tucked the duvet back under her and slowly made his way to Frankie’s room.

"I'm so lucky" he thought to himself. Perfect wife, perfect daughter, perfect home. Life couldn’t get much better than this.


6.20am – Dr. Lindsay Scott-Peters
Downward dog.

Push it, push it

*STRETCHING INTENSIFIES*


6.25am – Bob Castellano
It was a full 10 seconds before Bob realised it was his alarm. The new “Early Riser” sound on the iPhone starts soft and slowly builds to coax you out of…

*SNOOZE*


6.27am – Lim Wyn
Lim crouches in darkness. Waiting.


6.30am – John Scottson
"Hello, I'm John". Nope. Forgettable.

"Hi there! John”. Nope. Dial up the corporate Johnny.

"John - new Senior VP of GFS". Nope. No titles. Man this is tough.


6.35am – Dr. Lindsay Scott-Peters
Knee to chest - pull it harder

*STRETCHING INTENSIFIES*


6.37am – Lim Wyn
Lim crouches in darkness. Waiting.


6.40am – Bob Castellano
It was a full 10 seconds before Bob realised it was his alarm. The new “Early Riser” sound on the iPhone starts soft and slowly builds to coax you out of bed, making sure that you wake slowly and naturally and never, ever, ever hit snooze.

Fuck this fucking morning.

Right Bobby. Squeeze eyes shut. Fire them open. Leap out of bed and let's kick another day's ass!

*SNOOZE*


6.44am – Lim Wyn
Lim crouches in darkness. Waiting.


6.45am – John Scottson
"John Scottson". Bingo.

Now to work on the handshake angle...

"Morning Johnny! Coming to Bootcamp?"

"Not a chance! Today's the big day remember?"

"But you know Bootcamp is proven to make you more productive at work? Studies show that waving your hands above your head and running in circles increases endorphins and can reduce bingo wings by 37% in only 17 minutes per day!"

"Jesus Christ Maz, for once would you just stop with the 'Bootcamp' chat - this is a big day for me!"


6.51am – Lim Wyn
Lim crouches in darkness. Waiting.


7.02am – Dr. Lindsay Scott-Peters
Toes touched. Job done.

*STRETCHING UNTENSIFIES*


7.05am – Lim Wyn
The door to the cupboard creaks slowly open. The soft warm light of the bedroom seeps into Lim’s lair.

Lim leaps into action – screaming like a rabid orangutan. Thrusting his crotch towards his unsuspecting victim.

“RRAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHH!!!”

Donna recoils in terror, letting out a squeal that reminds Lim of the documentary he watched on the birth of the world’s first St. Bern-huahua (yes the “huahua” was the female bit).

“You fucking asshole. Lim. You complete and utter cock goblin”

Totally worth it.


7.11am – Dave Godders
“Bye honey!”

Paris softly rearranged his tie. Looked him up and down and gave an approving smile.

“Perfect. Have a good day sweetie”

Godders couldn’t help but notice the way the soft morning light glistened off the dew drops that were forming as the morning frost slowly.

He shut the door and began his trip to the office. Whistling a cheery tune as he almost skipped down the road.


7.15am – Bob Castellano
It was a full 10 seconds before Bob realised it was his ala..

Fuck.

Fuck fuck fuck fuck. Late.


8.11am – Dave Godders
"Simpkins! Get here now you unimaginable cretin!”

“In what fucking world is double sided printing acceptable? At my hourly rate I can't waste fucking time working out which fucking way to turn the fucking pages.”

“Pull your fucking finger out or I'll bust you back down to associate quicker than you can suck off the whole corporate law division."

“And that’s pretty fucking quick Simpkins. Radler tells me you’re the fucking Yoda of sucking dick.”

“This is asset backed securitisation, you ridiculous twat. not the fucking Vauxhall conference."

Shit. That was going so well. Everyone knows it's the Vanarama National league. I'm showing my age and I need to keep my "youngest partner in history" aura or Thompson will have my job in no time.

"Now go fetch me my fucking macchiato and try not to fuck that up too"

Flat white. The kids drink flat whites. Fuck.


8.27am – John Scottson
"John. John Scottson"

90 degree arm angle – perfect. Alpha, but not aggressively so. Assert presence, but don’t dominate. Let them think they’re on top then pounce on their first mistake.

"Nice to meet you John, welcome to Jaipur Capital"


8.42am (for an 8am meeting) – Bob Castellano
Sorry guys, trains messed up. What do I need to know for 8.45? Always on Monday's ey?"

Note to self – the train excuse no good for a month.